Scott & Sunny

Scott & Sunny

Sunday, August 19, 2007

I hate this shit.

Scott is fast asleep connected to his pole but no antibiotics yet (grrrrrrr!) and since Im not exactly known for my patience (its a good job Im not Dr Kildare then isnt it - Lorna may be the only one who has a clue what that means) I am on the verge of trotting off and boiling someones bunny.

He is too tired and that is what worries me, tired and no appetite or thirst. I am worried and I dont do stress well. My chest hurts and my head is thumping, it even hurts to look through my eyes.

His temperature has dropped so goodness knows what is going on. I am waiting for the bloodwork to come back, this will either send me into full scale meltdown or will bring a big stupid smile to my face. Scratch that, the nurse has just come in and told me it hasnt even been sent to the lab yet and it was drawn almost 2 hours ago. Blood cultures have been done but final results take 72 hours.

I also have an ache as this will be the first year I havent been able to see my beautiful son off for his first day back at school. It hurts a lot and I am very sorry Derry that I cant be there for you, I'll be thinking of you baby and cant wait to hear all about it and how much school sucks and how nerdy your teachers are and how David gave you a hard time and made you tuck your shirt in. Im sorry Derry, I love you so much and this is breaking my heart. But we'll be back home real soon.

Well thats all for now constant reader (channeling Steven King makes me feel important).


christine said...

Oh Steff - I'm crying just reading this. My heart is with you and just hope and pray that the blood is ok. Have been thinking of Derry going back to school this morning (it's 11.53 here so he's probably just getting up) and so sorry you can't be there for him -this illness makes you all suffer. Derry - I think about you every day and hope today goes well for you - even if the teachers are nerds - and tucking your shirt in isn't that bad is it? Lesley and David often ask after you all and send there love - I know they read the blog sometimes. Will try to call you at the hospital today.
lots of love and hugs

Laura said...

My heart goes out to you Stephanie. I am thinking of Derry as he begins another school year. I'm sorry you can't be with him now. There's just nothing about this situation that doesn't stink. Scott is in my prayers and thoughts everyday and I'll be sure to pray extra hard he gets to come home with his family VERY soon. You are an amazing mum - hang in there like I know you will and please know all of us are thinking of your family and sending our love and support. I'll write again soon.

Sending Hugs, Angel Laura

Lorna said...

hey steph...what can i say...its shit..give my love to the boys..hope the bloodwork comes back with good news. i have 2 more nights here so will try to call you at home tomorrow. just got a laptop so i should be able to stay in touch in zanz. life will return to normal eventually. this too will pass. xxx

Sandie said...

Oh Steph... It is absolute shit. My heart aches for you. If all the moments someone spends thinking of you, Scott, Derry and David make any difference at all, some good news is over-due. I wish I could make you a decent cup of coffee. Lots of love to you, sunshine. xoxoxox S.