Beaten Down

The side effects of all the drugs continued through today. The only bright spot was at least there was no vomiting. However, as soon as the first dose of morphine wore off, Scott was in incredible pain instantly. This time worst than earlier in the afternoon.

A larger dose of morphine. Not exactly what one wants their 10-year-old to have.

An abdominal and chest xray was ordered with the call to the doctor as well. His abdominal x-ray showed excessive gas building up in his intestines, which could likely be creating the pain and radiating upwards into his back, just between the shoulder blades. Scott can't even get off the bed at this point. He can't stand solidly on his feet. Can't walk the halls. Can harldy sit up without bursting into tears.

Once again - uncertainty.

Derry and I just got back home. It is painful to walk out of the hospital when the chance of another horrid episode lingers just a couple hours away when the current dose of heavy-duty drugs wears away. Scott was very clingy and emotional, even in the fog of the drug. The toll of the treatment seems to compound with each of the heavy doses. It beats the cancer down, but also beats all the good cells down as well. There is nothing remotely close to "easy" about any of the treatment. It is all just pure hell for him.

He's got another round of bloodwork coming at 1 a.m. Hoping to get at least another good drop in the methotrexate level.